As a new decade and new year begins, it is a time for reflection and hopes for the future.
The last decade has been a mixed bag of emotions, experiences, challenges and hardship.
I've travelled to some fantastic places, Florida, Spain, Croatia, Corfu, Albania, Rhodes, Slovenia, Malta, Budapest, the Phillipines, Lithuania, Devon, Montenegro, Venice, Austria, London, Windsor, Liverpool.
I was made redundant from a job that I had for thirteen years and loved. I got another job that I hated and which made me ill and which I am still recovering from. And I now have another job which is OK but in which I am unfulfilled.
I have made friends but also lost contact with a few. Also I have had to say goodbye to family members (both mine and Mr A's)who have sadly passed away.
I have adjusted to my brother no longer living a quarter mile away to him being 60 miles away and only seeing him every couple of months. Although we speak to each other every day either by messenger or phone.
I have met my wonderful sister in law Rhea who I love dearly and I am so happy that my brother is married to such a lovely person.
I have another cat, Eric. My baby boy, and little brother to my girls Kiwi and Willow. He is my little angel and has made our little cat family complete.
I have been to the Olympics (in 2012)cricket and rugby matches. These are things I thought I would never do before I met Mr A.
I have been to some lovely weddings of friends and family (including the wedding of my brother Richard and Rhea in the beautiful Phillipines
I have suffered and am still suffering to some extent from anxiety and depression and that has had a big impact on my confidence and well being especially over the last 5 years. Some days are better than others, some days I don't even know how I manage to function. Life sometimes has been hard and I've grieved for my parents who have departed more than a decade or two ago.
However, throughout this decade, I have had the unconditional love and support of my wonderful husband Mr A, who himself, has gone through change and challenges. He has been my rock and my reason for getting out of bed every morning.
My hopes and aspirations for this year are as follows:
1. Self care
At times I have put others before myself to the detriment of my own wellbeing and mental health. I need to start putting myself first more and looking after myself better. This year I'm going to treat myself to more "me" luxuries like actually having my hair cut regularly, maybe have a manicure or facial once in a while. I want to look at making more healthy choices in terms of my eating and drinking (I rarely drink alcohol but looking at sugar/sweeteners, dairy, fats etc). I want to look after my mental health and are looking at having counselling or therapy to address some anxieties and long standing issues I have. I want to go out into the outdoors more and get more fresh air. I want to allow myself me time and not feel guilty if I don't clean the house one day because I'm binge watching to or reading or even having a nap.
2. Be more social
Mr A and I are both quite insular and like to be together and being at home. We're not big on going out much and are content with each other's company. That is all well and good, but I do think that we need to be more socially active and go out more. We have some really great friends but to be honest we don't see too often. I want that to change that this year. I would like this year to be a year of friendship renewal and having fun
3. Get organised
Each year I do say I want to be more organised and I have made some improvements over the last year, but I need to go further with getting rid of "stuff", clearing the house up, cleaning and organising what "stuff" is left. The three areas of my home I want to tackle is the conservatory, our bedroom and the second bedroom. The second bedroom is where I would like to make into a relaxation/ reading/library/guest room as currently it is where I have basically dumped all my craft and art stuff and not used.
4. Hobbies other than reading
I want to actually do all the lovely hobbies I enjoyed before I was ill as a consequence of my previous job. I used to scrapbook, cross stitch, create art, and made cards. I must have spent thousands on these hobbies with everything you could ever think of. I need to invest more times doing these and they do make me happy and fulfilled creatively and above all use all the lovely goodies I have purchased over the last decade.
5. Be brave
I want to be brave in looking for new job/career opportunities, even if that means going out of my comfort zones.
I want to address my anxiousness over driving which had become a problem especially over this last year.
I want to be brave in finding some answers to why I can feel so down a lot of the time.
I want to be brave in the choices I make for all that I have mentioned in this post.
I am hoping that 2020 is a positive year for me and my friends and family and that I will embrace life wholeheartedly.
Wishing you all a great new year
Love Lesley xx
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